Distant Memories and new beginnings!
It has been a REALLY long time! 141 days to be exact. I don't know how many people are still paying attention, but I'm going to continue, because it serves as a way to document my journey... Even if no one is following... The journey continues and keeps getting better!
In the past four months, I can honestly and gratefully say that Cancer has almost completely left my mind; it will ALWAYS be there, but it's tucked away in a quiet corner of my mind. My symptoms have all but completely gone. The neuropathy is pretty much all gone and the joint pain is still present, but completely manageable. I still feel like I struggle with "chemo-brain" from time to time; it has been the only thing remaining that I have a hard time with. It's frightening because sometimes my brain just goes completely STATIC, it's like drawing a complete blank on your own name. It will get better with exercise, practice and time; just like the joint / body aches and all other side effects. It will pass...
My hair is getting longer and longer. It's still super curly, but I feel like that might be starting to change (at least on top - go figure). But I'm enjoying every minute of it.
It's interesting adjusting to the new length and styles that it wants to be. When I think back to a year ago.... I couldn't be more grateful to be where I am today.
On March 31, 2019, I was baptized into my church. Lifesong Church has been.... literally, the greatest blessing and gift to my life. I am learning SO much about myself through learning more about Jesus.
I NEVER in a MILLION years thought I would be able to say that I read (study / listen) to the bible each and every single day and I look forward to it. The spiritual strength and clarity that this has provided me is bringing me to an entirely different level of self confidence that I never imagined possible.
Certain things don't bother me as they once did, I don't tolerate certain behaviors and people as I once did and I have more patience with people and life in general.
Not everyone is going to understand this part of my journey, and that's ok, it's for me, not for anyone else. The only thing I can say... is that people are seriously missing out. I have more FAMILY than I ever have throughout my entire life. People who genuinely care about me and truly understand what it means to love unconditionally, because they know and understand the love of Jesus. It's an entirely different world. It feels safe, I feel like I can be myself and be 100j% accepted. (If you would like to learn more about Lifesong Church, please contact me, I promise you, you won't regret it)
I truly feel brand new, there is such an incredible beauty in that, but there is also a kind of pure vulnerability to it as well; its almost as if I'm seeing the world through brand new eyes, sometimes that's a good thing, sometimes, not so much. I see so much clearer what deserves my time and energy and what does not.
This last year has brought more growth, change and love than I ever thought possible. There are constant changes on the horizon and the possibilities are endless. I'm excited about each and every brand new day.
Another big (or not really so BIG) change for us is that we grew our family by four tiny little feet. His name is Paco; he is a Chihuahua and he's THE AWESOMEST little puppy I have ever met. He and Buddy are great friends and he's smart and SO full of personality and my best little friend (next to Buddy of course)
We are off to a FANTASTIC start to 2019 and I have a feeling it's going to be one of my best years ever.
I hope you're still following me, if you are.... THANK YOU for taking this walk with me. If you're new with me, I'm glad you're here.
XOXO